Abusers don’t lead with their worst qualities.
They lead with their best ones.
They can appear:
Nice
Sweet
Thoughtful
OR
Fun
Exciting
Charming
OR
Sad
Pitiful
Victimized
And none of these personas scream “abuser.”
You wouldn’t initially think that someone who is nice, fun, or pitiful would be one of the most manipulative and selfish people you’ve ever met.
And if the abuser is your family member…
Then you grew up thinking this is “just the way they are.”
Because abusers and especially narcissists are so good at hiding behind their mask-
That you believe the mask is them.
And that the moments of them being antagonistic, vindictive, and passive-aggressive are anomalies – as if they’re just having a “bad day.”
And that’s why especially narcissistic abuse is so insidious. Because the damage is done before you even realize you’re being abused.
